


Self Care Bear

by talula



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-19
Updated: 2014-04-19
Packaged: 2018-01-20 01:24:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1491529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talula/pseuds/talula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A snippet of comfort post 3B.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self Care Bear

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: follows canon. Boo.

Stiles is sitting in his jeep outside of Eichen House, a small duffel bag and his pillow in the passenger seat. He can't stop his leg from shaking and he has been working his left thumbnail between his teeth for fifteen minutes. 

The tap on his window makes him jump. He rolls down the window and Derek leans in on folded arms. 

"What are you doing here?" But he says it like he knows, likes it's only half a question and half a resignation. He wonders if Derek followed him here or if he just periodically drives by places of potential craziness on his nightly werewolf rounds. He thinks to ask, but he skips over his curiosity. It doesn't matter. This is the end of the line for him and it doesn’t matter.

"Just checking myself back in. Heard they missed me here. I made out with Malia in the basement, you know. I'm already famous in there. Stuff of legends." 

"I know," Derek says, not taking the bait of turning this into a joke. His face almost looks sad, like he wished he didn't know. "You're not going back." 

Stiles hasn't seen Derek for months. The one time they've interacted, he threw him against a wall. It wasn’t him. But it was him. It doesn't matter, soon he won't have to think about it anymore.

Stiles lowers his head, looks at his hand. He knows he can't get past Derek physically, that his only chance was making it seem like no big deal. 

He doesn't realize that Derek has moved from his place by his window until his passenger side door is opening and he sees Derek grab his bag and pillow. 

"Come with me," he says and shuts the door, walking away from him.

"Hey!" Stiles flies out of the jeep, slamming the door, anxiety tamped down for some outrage, maybe a hint of desperation. "Hey! What do you think you're doing?"

Derek puts the things in his trunk and slams it shut, looks at Stiles with more kindness than Stiles expects. 

"Come on man, I can't sleep without my pillow, give it back."

"You can't go back there."

Stiles runs his hand through his hair, pushes his lips together, and breathes heavily through his nose. "Listen, I have to, ok? You don't understand. I can't..." And he rears back on his own heels because he can't even say what he can't do. He can't even talk about how wrong the world is, how he fought through a nightmare only to wake up in a worse nightmare. How he didn't figure it out fast enough and the worst thing he could think of actually happened. And it was his fault. 

Derek had gotten closer to him and he pushes at his shoulder, gently at first, just because he's startled. But it feels good. Derek feels solid against his hand and pushing takes some of the shaking out of his own limbs. He does it again. Derek lets him.

"You have to let me go." He means to whisper, but he thinks it comes out louder. 

"Stiles," he says softly, and he's been pushed all the way against his own car, Stiles close in his face. "Stiles, they'll lock you up. They'll drug you so you don't know who you are."

Stiles makes a strangled sound, almost a laugh, almost relief. "That's what I want."

"I know," Derek says quickly. "Come home with me. One night. Then you can decide." 

Stiles deflates, backs up, and doesn’t say anything. Then gets in Derek's car. 

 

The car ride is quiet until Derek says "Hey, remember when you and Scott made me watch inception?"

It's so unexpected it takes Stiles a second to respond. "Yeah..."

"I had one. A dream within a dream." 

Silence stretches for a few moments. Derek's eyes are on the road and he’s tapping his left index finger against the steering wheel. Stiles doesn’t want to interrupt and actually bites his tongue to stop himself. 

"It was Kate. I had a dream she was back. She shot me. Then I was in a locker room with you, telling you about the dream and asking you how to tell if it's a dream."

"Fingers," Stiles whispers.

Derek looks over at him. "Yeah, fingers. Except when I grabbed your hand you had six. I woke back up to Kate transforming into a were-jaguar. Then I woke up for real, in my bed, in my loft, alone."

Stiles takes a breath to calm himself, try to keep from- he can't help it, he busts out laughing. 

"A were-jaguar?" Stiles tips his head back in laughter.

"Stiles, it's not funny," Derek says, but then chuckles just from hearing stiles laughing. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Stiles forces himself to calm down, wipes his eyes, settles in his seat and looks at Derek. Derek looks over at the same moment and they both start laughing at the same time. 

"It was pretty ridiculous," Derek says, smiling now. 

He continues talking, and his smile fades. "Look, I'm just trying to say, I know what it's like to lose people you love, and to feel responsible for that." 

Stiles loses his smile too, remembering what he was about to do before Derek stopped him. He looks out the window. They're getting further away from town, it's mostly trees passing by quickly. 

"So how do you get over it?"

Derek takes a deep breath. "That's what I'm trying to tell you. Kate killed my family close to ten years ago, and she's been dead for years. And I still have nightmares."

Stiles looks over sharply. "This is a horrible pep talk."

"It's not a pep talk. I can't show you how to get over it. But I can show you how to live with it." 

When they get to Derek's loft, it's a little nicer than Stiles remembers. The couch looks new, and there are throw pillows and blankets. There is a tv. There is a blu ray player. There is an Xbox. 

Derek moves directly into the kitchen and starts clanking things. Stiles drops his bag next to the couch and tosses his pillow on the couch. He's still taking it all in when Derek walks back in the room with two mugs and hands him one.

"What's this?" Stiles asks, even as he takes it. 

"Hot chocolate." Derek toes off his shoes and sits on the couch cross legged. 

"Ok," Stiles says slowly. "But what is this?" He makes a gesture with his free hand towards the mug and the couch. 

"It's called self-care and we're gonna try it out." 

Stiles raises an eyebrow. "It has been a while since I've self-cared, but this is not usually how I do it." 

Derek honest to god blushes as he takes a sip, then puts his mug down quickly. "Oh! I almost forgot the pajamas," and he sprints off into the bedroom. 

Ten minutes later, Derek and Stiles are sitting on the couch sipping hot chocolate, watching the new Spiderman. They are both in pajamas. Stiles’ has a Superman logo on his chest and tiny superman figures on the red pants. Derek’s is similar, except with Batman. The pants are black. They are soft, the kind of soft that feels too good; that doesn’t last more than a few washings before turning pilly and scratchy. Stiles thinks about that for a moment, tries to push it aside for enjoying it for the moment. Then it hits him; what this is supposed to be about.

“Is this supposed to be about enjoying the moment?” 

“You’re enjoying the moment?” Derek’s mouth quirks up at the side. 

“Yeah, I guess. Trying not to think too much.”

Derek nods, and they fall back into the movie. Stiles puts his mug down and stretches out on the couch, head close to Derek’s legs. Derek moves his arm up slightly, and Stiles moves his head in. It feels natural, and neither of them make a big deal of it. He lays his head on Derek’s leg. Derek starts idly running his hand through Stiles’ hair. Stiles just breaths, letting his body relax for the first time in weeks. His focus zeros in on the sensation of Derek’s fingers tingling through his scalp. He’s warm inside and out, the pajamas on the outside, and hot chocolate warmth radiating from within. 

Stiles hasn’t told anyone, but he hasn’t slept since Allison died. He’s been too scared something horrible would happen again, that he would get possessed and hurt someone. He also doesn’t want to see the nightmares. He knew his dad had been staying awake to come help him when he woke up screaming. So he had told his dad they were gone, and he was sleeping fine. 

He knows Derek will be there if he wakes up screaming. He knows Derek can stop him if he wakes up a murderer. He feels the world get heavier around him. He closes his eyes. He doesn’t fight it. He falls asleep.


End file.
